are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
