She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
