dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
My vagina is officially offended.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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