bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
