you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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