hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize