his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
