Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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