i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Randomize