Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Randomize
