Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
BRING THE BAGELS
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Randomize
