He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
