Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
oh god the rape fog is back!
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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