Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
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