I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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