operation harelip BJ is a go
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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