you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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