One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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