This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize