Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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