If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
