a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Randomize
