i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize