how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize