is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
