Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
