She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
