normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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