we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
