I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
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