Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
