i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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