This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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