Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I wish i was in the wii world.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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