No more Irish car bombs ever.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Floor bacon is actually really good
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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