She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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