look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
