4 words: hood of his car
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
