Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
i now understand why vodka
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Randomize
