walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
