Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
