i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
