If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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