Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
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