think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I can't trust your balls anymore.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
