i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
two words...techno handjob
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
