I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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