SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
