East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.