Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize