i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Randomize
