Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
We are two peas in an std pod
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize
