ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Randomize
